away in a manger v3m style (or in praise of all things Mac)

[redline]

Introduction ,

Over the past eight months we have had our very own bright star in the East .(well Needham Market ) by the name of Mac who, despite illness in the family has always been there to help so ( without wishing to appear at all gay ) here is my little tribute to him.

Away in his workshop
Mac is scratching his head
the gasket kit has alloy screws
they want stainless instead

Now Mac is the master
he's not easily fazed
so he gets out his stainless screws
and the kit price is raised

His cvt tester
is pure genius
we are all just so grateful
that he's one of us

His diagrams are clear
and easy to read
He always makes time for you
He's one of a breed

There is nothing he dosen't know
about volvo cars
what he didn't learn while working
he's picked up in bars

He loves getting dirty
stripping down his old bits
like four speed gear boxes
and dodgy old diffs

He passes his knowledge
freely and with glee
and he looks just like santa
with a child on his knee

We thank you dear Maccy
for all that you've done
to help maintain 300's
seem almost like fun



Happy christmas Mac and Mrs Mac

[classicswede]

A big thanks to Mac

He passes his knowledge
freely and with glee
and he looks just like santa
with a child on his knee

This bit is funny - you know santa is not allowed to have a child sit on his knee anymore!!!

[redline]

I know ,

I played santa last Saturday for our scout group at a local garden centre ,

still theres nothing to say the mums can't sit on your knee ,


it go's something like

" and has mummy been a good girl this year ?, would she like something from santas sack "

[Chris_C]

Only works if the Mum is in your target age range though... so not for most of us

[redline]

Only works if the Mum is in your target age range though... so not for most of us

I wouldent be so sure Chris

working on Eddie the elfs theory of relationshiptivity most kiddies grow out of the whole

santas grotto thing at around 8 years old.

most women give birth when they are between 16 and 30

therefore most 8 year olds mums are between 24 and 38

working on the average of 2.4 children per household in th u.k. Eddie the elf reckons the formula is

you take 24 from 38 divide by 2.4 to get the average age of mums taking there children to see Santa.

14 divided by 2.4 = 5.83 recurring

add that onto 16 ( youngest respectable age to give birth these days ) gives you an average age of mums taking children to see santa as

21 years and 8 months

Now are you going to argue with an elf 10 days before christmas

[Chris_C]

I think Eddie may have his maths slightly squiffy, but I'll give him bonus points for a cool theory... I'm all for random theory's!

[classicswede]

You could eb unlucky and Granny takes the kids

[redline]

You could eb unlucky and Granny takes the kids

[d3k4y0]

working on the average of 2.4 children per household in th u.k. Eddie the elf reckons the formula is

you take 24 from 38 divide by 2.4 to get the average age of mums taking there children to see Santa.

14 divided by 2.4 = 5.83 recurring

add that onto 16 ( youngest respectable age to give birth these days ) gives you an average age of mums taking children to see santa as

21 years and 8 months

Now are you going to argue with an elf 10 days before christmas

I am! That would be the average age of a mother when giving birth to their first child, if a woman had an 8 year old at age 21y8m years, they would have had to have given birth at age 13y8m. If this where true, and we know that many women are putting off children to a later age, it would suggest that there are as many women giving birth below (and as far below) the average as they are above (and as far above).

Taking statistics from Eurostat (independant statisticans) about first time mothers in the UK

In 2004 there were 102,228 births to women aged 35-39

then by your calculations there must have also been around 100,000 births to females aged up to 26 years beneath your average.
This means that there must be mothers giving birth at age - 9 years.
Obviously this is impossible, but we do know that the [url=http://youngest_mother.tripod.com/]youngest mother[/url] in recorded history was aged 5 years, 8 months at the birth.

so to make any sensible assumptions, weighted statistics could come into play.

If 100,000 women are giving birth to children up to 26 years above your average of 13, then to back up your statistics, and using Lina Medina as a minimum age, then the number of children given birth to by mothers in the age range 5y8m to 13y8m (or up to 8 years below your average) then the maths work thusly.

The ratio of the age ranges is 26:8, which equates to 3.75:1
So for every parent in the range above the average, there are 3.75 below.

This means that in 2004 102,228*3.75, or 383,355 children born to mothers below 13y8m.

Now, according to the 2001 census, there are 4,505,225 people aged between 5 and 13 in England, so half that and the rough number of girls in that age is 2252612.
this would mean that 1 in every 6 girls below third year of senior school (year 9) would have a child.

Somehow I think your elf may be mistaken!

[redline]

Somehow I think your elf may be mistaken!

Or perhaps just a very hopefull dirty little elf (or a goblin in disguise )